HOW TO EMBARRASS YOURSELF..

I would like to introduce our new weekly post.. How to embarrass yourself...

Since I'm in the common habit of laughing at others (I'm going to counseling for this), I figured the Three Brown Chicks can turn the tables on themselves. So each week, one of the chicks will reveal something embarrassing. I think it will be very difficult for me since I am awesome and perfect in every way imaginable.

HOW TO EMBARRASS YOURSELF... AT A FUNERAL.

I dislike funerals. I'm never comfortable being among the non living. I haven't been to a funeral since my grandmother's passing in 2005. NEVER to make light of the pain associated with someone's untimely passing, I went to the funeral to show support for a former coworker. As usual, I'm late. So I find a parking space, jump out the car and see a line of fellow mourners entering the church. Because of my hastiness, I don't pay attention to see who is in the line. I follow the line inside and prepare myself for the viewing. Since the dearly departed was part of the Atlanta Police Department, the whole bottom level of the church was completely packed with APD officers. My first thought is "How do I get to the balcony?". Once I get down the aisle, I realize I'm in the "FAMILY" line. Oh no! How do I get out without looking like a complete LOSER? So as I proceed past the casket, I try to make a dash for the rear and was politely shoved by a senior member of the Usher Board into the family seating section. Cringe! How do you plead your case in the middle of a funeral to a 70 year old black woman with a stern look on her face holding a fan? I thought I heard the whispers of ..."who is that?" and "how is she sitting with the family?" I wanted to kick myself. It was evident I was not up to date on my funeral protocol. The only thing I could think of is I have to make my escape before the processional to exit. I did not want to be caught walking behind the casket. Luckily, the woman next to me got up to go to the bathroom, so I just followed her to the back and found appropriate seating with the rest of the non family mourners. EMBARRASSING!! SORRY JESUS.