Dealing with Schizophrenia in Marriage

Okay, take a deep breath. That's what I tell myself today, of all days. I actually MADE it to my next anniversary. Phew! I love him, I really do. He's a great husband, a great dad, an easy going guy and oh soooooo very fine. He looks like what I always pictured as my dream man. But my goodness, this thing called marriage is like dealing with a serious bipolar, schizophrenic, disorder. One day your up, the next your down. Who am I today? Am I Lisa or Larry? Tammy or Tyrone? GEEZ. And in no way am I patronizing such a serious and real illness, but that's one of the only parallels I can think of that fit with what you go through. For anyone who told you that marriage is easy, they are LIARS!

First, that promise you made on that special day surrounded by friends, family, flowers and food is actually supposed to be kept. Can you believe that? Actually keeping a promise -- FOREVER. That means until you die. I mean, we've all said, okay, I promise not to gossip. Okay, I promise not to tell anyone that secret you told me. Hmmm, I'm sure at times we've all broken promises. But this one, this one in marriage is so real and so serious. So the road hasn't been easy. There have been major fights and major tears. But also lots of laughs and lots of special moments (sorry, not giving you those details).

Then people say...oh, you have to work at it. That is like the understatement of the century. I thought if you were all boo'ed up and in love, you'd just fight, make up and it's all good. Um, no. That's not the case. Keeping it real as I always do... Fights can last for days, weeks, even months. You can deal with the same recurring issue...day in and day out. Also, you and your friends may argue, cry, hug, apologize and then it's done, forgotten... but oh no...there's too much at stake when you're married to just to punk out like that -- you gotta hold your own. I've always been one to not like being "played" so when I feel that creeping up at all -- I go off! My husband's the same. He's not just going to back down like the softee he appears to be on the surface.

Then, one day, not magically, no doves flew through the air, it's like we finally got in synch. Well, at least this month. I guess my marriage has been taking its meds. All I know, I am in it for the long haul. I'm in it to win it. That's why God made wine, friends and blogs...so I can have a release. AHHHH! Breathe.